finally hit 10,000 views on this blog after 983438619837 years. It took almost 3 years and it's considered super duper slow because i know some people can easily hit 10k views in just 3 months. However, this feels like an accomplishment because I'm aware that i suck at blogging, and it just amazes me how people would even read this page of mine. I've wanted to announce this news months ago but i felt like i needed to write a longer post, so i decided to also blog about "10 things you probably didn't know about me" - basically i'm just sharing more about myself. 
Again, congratulations to this blog for reaching 10k, honestly i can't thank you guys (you readers) enough for making this possible. This might not seem like a big deal to some people, but every little thing matters to me! And if there's any vivid readers on this blog, thanks for always tolerating my sad sad sad sad posts and rants without giving up reading. 
Also mentioned that i was considering whether to delete/private this blog, and i made a decision that i wouldn't! At least for now, until the end of this year, at least. Promise i'll find time to blog during this hectic period of studying for O's, so do not fret if i don't post for a month or so.

so here you go - 10 things you probably didn't know about me! (Initially wanted to do 20 but i think it will bore everyone out, so.)

10 things you probably didn't know about me

i'm entirely made up of flaws

1. I have trust issues.
yes, saying this first because that's probably the main issue about me. I guess, anyone who's a vivid reader on my blog or anyone who have had come across some of my posts here would have known. Even though i've never been "broken" due to a relationship or been dumped by a guy, nor have i been taken advantage of (in any way) or have been cheated of my money, i find it difficult to actually trust someone as a whole. even if i have known you for ten years or even my entire life, just one lie or betrayal can change everything around. I absolutely can't stand anyone who don't mean what they say or say what they don't mean. Either you say what you mean....or you can just shut up  not say anything at all. Especially when it comes to things about myself or things i really care about - If you promise me anything then please just be a man of your words & keep to your promise. I know, people say "promises are meant to be broken" but no, i think that if you've promised not to spill any secrets out then just simply shut the fuck up for the rest of your life & nobody will ever know. Done, promise kept. See how easily it goes? if you don't mean anything you say, i suggest you better NOT say anything at all. Ever heard of this saying? "trust is like a crumpled paper; once it's crumpled it can never be perfect again." Just one time, one lie, one betrayal......and everything can change. I hate it when i find out that the people whom I trust talk bad about me behind my back - just tell me straight to my face. not only do i have trust issues with friends, i'm also exceptionally doubtful about love & relationships. i used to grow up thinking that i'll just be like any other woman in the world; date a guy, get married, have children, & live happily ever after. but my thinking have changed over the past years, & i now hold different views & perspectives towards everything about life. now, getting into a relationship, getting married, having children, etc doesn't even seem like a "need" anymore, but rather, something that goes according to one's destiny. if it's meant to be, it will be. thinking about my future seems rather daunting now, but i guess i will go according to what i'm set out to live for; & i've always believed in the caprice of fate.

2. That being said, another fact about me is that i've never been in an actual relationship.
of course, i've been through those stupid infatuations & childish puppy love r/s & crushes in and out of my primary school/lower sec life, but i've never been in an official one. but it's not a big deal to me, because being single is.........good. Also, i don't think someone would actually like anything about me, not to mention that someone would love me for who i am. (I don't even love myself)
......and i do not trust relationships because i do not believe in having someone who would love you enough for a lifetime.

3. I am somewhere between 165-166cm in terms of height. Many people tend to think that i've tall parents, but in fact no. my dad's 167cm tall, & my mum 158cm. My ideal height's 168cm, i really wish i can hit that height by the age of 18. (Could have just skipped this fact, but i don't have a lot of things to speak about myself, so.)

4. I'm more of an outdoor person.
i've always engaged in sports ever since i was young, but my stamina has always been the worst in my family (unfortunately) :( i've joined badminton in primary school when i was primary 3. i picked up swimming in primary 4 and went for badminton matches with my family & my dad's friends every sunday before/after swimming, & the year after we stopped doing both activities, my family started to go for evening jogs on sundays at bedok reservoir. come to think of it, we were a (kinda) sporty family. in secondary school, i joined tennis for my cca because i wanted to pick up a new skill. Not engaging in any physical activities for long would make me feel quite uncomfortable, i'm definitely not someone who can stand lying around the bed for the entire year.
Even though i love exercising, i can be a real lazy bum at times too. It's kinda contradicting, even though I've said that i'm not someone who can stand lying around the bed for too long, i can lie on my bed without moving for the entire day during weekends. (because lazy)

5. I wished NS (national service) was made compulsory for both men and women.
I know, i know, all of you might be thinking i'm crazy, but I really hoped it was true. I know that women can attend NS voluntarily, but there doesn't seem to be any future there, and there are probably no benefits to it. I told my mum that i wanted to go NS and she thought i was crazy. She also mentioned how girls would complain about their menstrual cramps during military exercises if girls had to attend NS. I just gave a huge sigh.
I actually envy guys because of this, because NS is such a great experience, plus - it can make you so so so so fit, tanned and toned (everything i want, ugh). okay brb while i sigh in a corner.

6. My favourite genre of music is classical music.
When i first told this to my piano teacher on the very first day of my piano lesson when she asked me what i liked, she gave me a stare and said, "wow, that's unusual." she said that most people love pop music, indie etc but I've always loved classical since young. i can vividly remember my dad's expression on his face whenever i tune in to the symphony 92.4 on the radio (when i was younger). He would be like "eh, this is weird, why would you listen to classical at such a young age?"
My favourite pianists would be Richard Clayderman, Beethoven and Yiruma. Even though i love classical music, I'm not really knowledgeable when it comes to pianists and music pieces, etc because i don't really spend time searching for piano pieces online, i believe i just need to tune in to symphony 92.4 on the radio and i just get what i want. Sticking to traditional pieces, my favourite pieces are Richard Clayderman's Mariage d'amour, Beethoven's fur elise (pronounced as "for alice"), Yiruma's River flows in you, Kiss the rain, Destiny of love, If i could see you again, May be and Pachelbel's Canon in d.
Managed to attend Yiruma's concert this year too, fortunately because his last concert was held in 2004 (ten years ago) and god knows whence he will come to singapore again :(

7. I learn piano.
The first time i learnt playing the piano was probably at the age of 5 or 6, when my dad taught me how to play "Mary had a little lamb...." Come to think of it, it's kinda surprising how a person like my dad would even know how to play the piano (not meant to be an insult, he's just not that kind of a music person hahaha) I started learning piano (bits and pieces) from my friend when i was in primary 5, so as my passion for piano started to kick in, i started going for piano classes at the beginning of my primary 6 year. i took lessons once/week for only 4 months before i had to quit because of PSLE, and then i stopped playing the piano completely until at the end of secondary 3. Stupid how i'm always joining piano during my major years (p6, sec 4) so i always have to give up halfway. Started all over again in grade 1 when i joined last November, and few months ago i've recently become a grade 2 student. But i still can't play for nuts, i think i really have zero talent for piano.
{+1 additional fact: I've a soft spot for guys who can play the piano.}

8. My closest kin is my father.
This may apply to a lot of girls out there, even though some tend to be closer to their moms. But the term "daddy's girl" applies a lot for me, i've always been my daddy's girl my whole life. They say that the first guy that you love is your father, i guess that's true. I've never loved any guy or anyone more than him, and i believe that will never change. I love you dad.

9. I value family more than friends.
I know this may seem out of the norm in society nowadays, but there's no doubt that i'd always choose family over friends. Not that friends do not matter to me; in fact i value both. But there's always this distinction between family and friends, and the former always takes up the first priority. Truth to be told, i hate it when people value friends more than their family. it irks me so much that some people would rather choose to party all night with their friends without spending even a minute with their family members. Most teenagers would prefer spending time with their friends as some of them may not be close with their parents etc, but i feel that it's definitely possible to become close with your family as long as you make an effort to try. Organise family outings every now & then, i promise it will be fun! Nothing's better than family gatherings. Cherish what you have & who you have with now before it's too late when you lose them.
Friends are also equally important, especially good friends whom you know that you would have until the day you die. Just treat good & close friends like family members; be generous with what you have and you'll get the same in return!

10. I believe that all good things come to an end.
Coincidentally, this fact is the last one before i end my post. well.....all good things come to an end, you see. (Not even sure whether this post's a good thing to start with) But i believe that happiness do not last long, happiness itself is hard to come by but it's short-lived. Bad things are bound to happen in life, thus happiness is only temporary. Even though happiness doesn't come easy, it's not impossible to be happy. Key to happiness? To look beyond your own imperfections & remember that you can do small things with great love.

With this, i end today's post. Also, wishing all muslim friends a Happy Selamat Hari Raya!
July's also coming to an end soon, i wish you guys would make the most out of the remaining days before August starts, and also have a blessed and fun August!

Till then!
Cheryl